Three Butler Buddies

 From  "Dennis J Lee (dennisl@Princeton.EDU)" <dennisl@Princeton.EDU> 
Sent  Friday, August 5, 2005 5:29 am
To  cuga@princeton.edu
Subject  Welcome to the Class of 2009!

 
Hello!

This summer, I've used the phrase, "Nanda goreh!!!"  many times, because sometimes that's all one can say.

I am welcoming you to the potentially great class of 2009!   You are undoubtedly more intelligent than I am, but that doesn't mean you are smarter than me.   Actually, yes it does.  You are smarter than me.

If you're confused, so am I.  There's apparently some sort of new program called Butler Buddies.  I got assigned some people to email, so that you would be all excited about coming to Princeton.  Um.  A little about myself, I am a sophomore, and i don't have a major.   I like music and sports.  My name is Dennis.

I don't know anything about you, except that I can guess you are Japanese American, or Japanese.  If you aren't, then that is bacca on my part to assume such a thing.   But I'm supposed to encourage you and get you excited for the school year! Hooray!

Princeton is awesome.  REally.  The tone of this email may not give you that feeling, but it is awesome, in case you didn't know.   Butler is not so awesome, in case you didn't know.   You happen to be in 1942, which has a one computer cluster, but not much else.  I was in 1940 last year, which is the same as 1942, except it has one less computer cluster.  Really, the dorms aren't bad at all.  I liked my room a lot.

Princeton is awesome because of the girls.   They're all so unappealing, all men can study.    I'm only kidding, of course.   Not  everyone studies.    What you will find is that everyone around you is amazing.  They'll be normal, and then all of a sudden they'll reveal retractable claws, or something ridiculously amazing.   One of my best friends is an origami expert., and another friend got 11th place in the National Spelling Bee.   And you're Japanese!  Which is amazing in itself, so you've got a head start.

Most people find their niche at Princeton at some point or another.   That is when Princeton becomes awesome.  The first semester is a lot of getting used to, friends, studying, food, blah, and if you are an engineer, you learn new skills like, how to rejoice over a B.  

This is the most unorganized, horrible welcoming letter.  I apologize.  I have too many paragraphs.

Okay well, I don't really know what to say, other than, Princeton is the place to be.   I didn't want to go to college last year, but now it's my home, and I'd be afraid to leave it.  

Please, please, email me back with any questions you have, or if I offended you in any way, let me know.    If you want to know about campus groups, majors, or any kind of boring little thing, let me know.    ARight  Cuga.  That could be your nickname next year, if it already isn't.

Dennis Lee 

From  "Dennis J Lee (dennisl@Princeton.EDU)" <dennisl@Princeton.EDU> 
Sent  Friday, August 5, 2005 6:01 am
To  dsassaro@princeton.edu 
Subject  Princeton Class of 2009

 
Hello David.   I know nothing about you, except that your last name could potentially be dangerous, because it starts with Sass.   I'm sure it makes for some annoying jokes.  I am your Butler Buddy, which some people might cleverly change to But Buddy, but that is really not appropriate, so I will not talk about that.     

So Dave Sassaroli is in the butt.  I bet they got a kick out of that.   No worries!  Butler is widely known as the worst residential college in terms of niceness, but Walker is probably the best dorm building in Butler.   I think you're gonna be living right next to my dorm - I'm in 322.

I won't really tell you much about myself, just in case you decide you don't really feel like being friends with me, which I totally understand.   I wouldn't normally want to be friends with anyone who signed up to send out emails to incoming freshmen, because those people are usually the most fake and annoying people.   Actually no, I am just thinking of the girl that made me sign up and do this.  She told me that I would only have to write one letter, but they ended up giving me three.  figures.

Since I have three But buddies, this may make you think that you are not special, but you know you are because you are going to Princeton.   Princeton is amazing because everyone seems pretty normal until you learn that your roommate once stole 8 pounds of popcorn from the dining hall. 

That would be me, of course.  I guess it's nothing to brag about since you are undoubtedly more intelligent than me, but I have had my moments.    Honestly, Princeton becomes better and better the more you spend time here.    School became fun when I came back from fall break and winter break, because it felt like coming home.  

You'll meet my roommates and me next year, and they are 20 times cooler than I am, so that's a relief.  

This could be one of the worst welcome letters to Princeton, so just email me back any questions you have, or if i have offended you in anyway, let me know.   Im not sure if you want to know about boring things like majors, classes, food, facilities and such.  I also dont know what type of person you are, so I am careful not to make politically incorrect statements againts gays, or use swear words, such as fuck.  

Yeah, so throw me back an email with any questions.  I hope you're excited for next year.   

Dennis Lee '08

From  "Dennis J Lee (dennisl@Princeton.EDU)" <dennisl@Princeton.EDU> 
Sent  Friday, August 5, 2005 6:17 am
To  mhcheng@princeton.edu 
Subject  Class of 2009

Hello, Matt

   I am your Butler Buddy.  I am supposed to welcome you into Princeton, with warm remarks and encouraging rhetoric.

  I don't know anything about you, but I can tell you that you are probably a hell of a lot smarter than I am.   If you aren't, you at least have a higher self-esteem at this point.    But let me tell you, Princeton is amazing.  It is home.  Of course it is not to you yet, but it soon will be.  And then you will be ours.

 Honestly, I think it's weird and annoying that I have to send an email to you.  You are the last of three students that I am sending a letter to, so by this time I am tired.   I'm usually not this weird when I write, but I you are not a real person to me, so I'm having a little fun.

  But alas, you are real person, and you will be living very close to me.  I'm in 322 Walker, with three other white dudes.  They're about 20 times cooler than me.   I'll only tell you a little about myself, in case you decide you don't want to be friends with me.   which is completely understandable.   I'm not a big fan of asian pride either.

 Speaking of Asians, one of my other But Buddies is Japanese.   There are hardly any on campus, so I'm excited to meet him.  I've heard so much about Japanese people.  Did you ever sing that little jingle in Elementary school?  "Bacca bacca chin chin....to you!"

I like sports and music.  I also like the store Target.  

By the way, if you want to know any boring stuff, like classes, majors, professors, food, facilities, shoot me back an email and I will inform you about those things. 

Butler is widely known as the worst of the 5 residential colleges, but don't worry, Walker isn't so bad.  You'll soon find that it's probably the best location on campus, too.   

When I just got out of high school, I really didn't feel like going to college, but it's truly awesome.  You can walk outside naked at 4 am and no one will say anything to you.  Not that that's the only plus, but you know, whatever you're into.  

I'd like to give you advice on things, but I don't know what type of person you are or anything.   I don't know whether you are geeky, ghetto, spikyhaired, fobby, awesome, quiet, or loud.   I myself am relatively a geek, even though I don't play computer games.  

If I have offended you in anyway, or you have any questions,
please please please email me back and i will shoot you a reply as soon as I can. 

Cheers

Dennis Lee '08